Black Hole Karl Holmqvist
A black hole sun would be the opposite of our source of light. Seems somehow to suck you in, to repulse, attract, like vertigo will make you fall, draw you in. Contrary to better knowledge. The sky is blue, but that’s just because space is endless. Seems strange that a black hole would be black since all of space is black. Not something you see with the eye, maybe, maybe more something you experience, something that just happens and then it’s too late. Anyway, black holes aren’t for people, for individuals, more like entire planets, or a spaceship. It gives vertigo, a sense of nausea, to think that planet earth is floating around in space; anything could happen to it at any given moment … And then what? If the ground on which we stand isn’t safe, then what? Terrorists, kidnappers, people-haters all have nothing on that, what if the entire planet just got sucked into a black hole? Life and death and what’s the difference? How can you tell one thing from the rest? At what point will you give up consciousness, no longer be you? Will that be a loss or a relief?
What do you have to cling to, to hold on to? A black hole is too much. Beyond comprehension. More like depression, like a metaphor. Part of the everyday. A black hole is to walk into a wall. With nothing. Liberation. Imprisonment. Against one’s will somehow. Not something you would wish even on your worst enemy, your ex-boyfriend. A black hole is too much, not somewhere, anywhere anyone would want to go. No, no, no no, no to a black hole. No to a black hole. Just say no. So negative. So in-sucking. So against all. Up against the wall. Without any individual will, without exception. Suck you in, indifference. Without differentiation. So not me. So no to all. No memory, no loss. No memorial, will to recall. So no to all.
A black hole is liberation, is outbreak, is the end of thoughts. Insecurities, being mean and cheap. Being me. Proud to be. To achieve. A black hole is no control. No to all. Not yes. No agreement. No history, no historical figures. Coming full circle. A rhythm, maybe, of going and coming. Coming back at regular intervals. No jealousy or misgivings. No wanting what others have. No need, no craving. A black hole is Nirvana. Is there no meaning to life? No final goal? Its only meaning is to give it up?
Start from zero. Try again, come again? That’s all? A black hole is the end to climate change, atomic war. The end to pollution, both inner and outer. An end to facades. Fakeries. Final judgment. Beyond final judgment even, since no judgment, no right from wrong. Just suck you in empty space, will end one day. Coming out on the other side. Metaphorically, sunshine and birdsong. How we imagine happiness is always somewhat banal. Panic and suffering is more fulfilling. The idea of getting through something, having the sense of being alive. Being able to cope. Testing one’s limits. To sense, sense, sense. No black holes, no. No to black holes.